Given that we here at The Tortilla Retort are privy to information, data and formulas not avaible to commoners, we were able to accurately calculate where the face of the Earth ends.  Rest assured Red Raider Nation, our results indicate we are nowhere near falling off of it in 2009. 

Our formula accurately calculates the face of the Earth as somewhere between Boone, NC and College Station, TX.

If we didn’t have something to bitch about, then we wouldn’t be fans.  That’s what fans do.  We also gobble up season tickets, attend spring scrimmages, follow the lives of teenage boys closer than Pete Townsend and consume copious amounts of alcohol in a Lubbock parking lot every other Saturday in the fall.  We will spend damn good money to find something to bitch about.  And, the Tech fanbase is one of the more tolerant around.  Still, our expectations have risen higher than ever and the threat of a return to mediocracy constantly tugs at us all.  That’s why I went to the trouble of figuring where the face of the Earth was for you.  That shit’s not easy.  You try it.

First of all, we need to set the bar for realistic expectations.  From 1996 to 2001, Texas Tech won 40 games and lost 31.  We were a 6-5 program for the most part with the 7th win hinging on bowl results.  For the 2002-2007 period, Tech was victorious 51 times and suffered defeat in 26 contests, or roughly 8-4 and a bowl matchup deciding the 9th win.  In my humblelistic opinion, that’s not bad considering our resources.  This was our first 11 win season since inception to the Big 12, and not many programs in the country achieve that kind of success.  I’m not expecting us to in 2009.  We play in a tough conference and other teams will be improving as well.  Maybe at a greater rate than us, but the cupboard is not bare after the departure of Graham Harrell and Michael Crabtree.  We’ve been consistent and history tells us we won’t be slipping past the 8-4 mark.  Mack Brown just proved it is possible to go 12-1 without a running game.  So let’s see how many games we’ll be favored in as it stands right now:

W vs. North Dakota (1-0) - I’m going to pencil in a win here.  A loss might prove our formula was off.  Brandon Williams and McKinner Dixon should be too much off the corner for the North Dakotans.  I’m too lazy to lookup their mascot.

W vs. Rice (2-0) - Chase Clement and Jarrett Dillard will be a much bigger loss to Rice than Harrell and Crabtree will be to Tech.  Plus, it’s in Lubbock.

W @ Houston (3-0) – This will be a tough game as Case Keenum and Bryce Beall should be able to expose our young safeties to some extent, but the Cougars lose 7 starters on defense and break in a new left tackle against Williams.  Houston graduates the entire defensive front 4 including sackmaster Phillip Hunt.  I would imagine this will be our first opportunity to see the ability of uber recruits Harrison Jeffers and Lonnie Edwards on full display, and what should be an improved running game.

W vs. New Mexico (4-0) – The Lobos are breaking in a new coaching staff along with their 7 new starters on defense.  In Lubbock, I expect this to be very Rice-like, but New Mexico historically plays Tech tougher than they do other opponents.

W vs. Kansas State (5-0) – I’m not sold on Bill Snyder’s return, although, he’ll have a fine staff.  Josh Freeman should decide to stick around, and if he does, then our safeties will face a true test.  We could possibly have to eek out a close win in Lubbock.  Williams and Dixon will come in handy against the North teams.

L @ Nebraska (5-1) – It’s arguable that Nebraska loses just as much as Tech on offense, and we might be replacing ours with better players than what the Huskers have to offer.  I expect the Nebraska defense to keep improving, especially if Ndamukong Suh returns for his last year.  I don’t see them getting much faster at DE, and we could be good enough at the position to win a close ball game.  I would like to see Batch and Jeffers combine for 30-35 carries in this game away from Suh, but that’s probably too optimistic on my part.  We’ll know right here what kind of team we have.

W vs. Texas A&M (6-1) - Is it irrational for me not to believe Mike Sherman is the answer?  It’s in Lubbock, but Johnson, Tannehill and Fuller are good enough to expose our deep middle.  If you can’t tell by now, I’m largely depending on our ability to sack the QB without blitzing as a difference in several ball games much like 2008.  I think that’s an asset in the Big 12.  You’re welcome to disagree.

W vs. Kansas (7-1) – I like getting these tweener games in Lubbock.  These are ones we exceedingly struggle with on the road when breaking in a new QB.

L @ Texas (7-2) – They are going to be extremely pissed off at home, and should take care of business against us.  Although, I’m not convinced at this point, Texas will be stopping anyone’s running game in 2009.  We need to spend four quarters practicing our playaction game as the now experienced Texas back 7 will be a more integral part of run defense next year.  If Kindle leaves early, I might start becoming giddy, given we haven’t self-imploded by this point in the season, which is always a possibility.

L @ OSU (7-3) – We never win in Oklahoma.  I call it Quanah’s Revenge.  Although, the Cowboy ground attack might not be so vaunted without Russell Okung, David Washington, Steve Denning and Brandon Pettigrew. 

W vs. OU (8-3) - I’m basing this on Bradford leaving, which could obviously change results.  With a Heisman and 5 starters graduating on the OL, I’m banking on him wearing a Chiefs jersey next year.  Landry Jones would be the first good QB to come out of New Mexico.  I’m not sure he is.

W @ Baylor (9-3) – Briles is making progress and this should be a shootout.  Tech will be relying on Williams and Dixon to do more damage than their Baylor counterparts.  I think they can.

Bizarre.  That’s exactly where I predicted us in 2008.  Hopefully, I’m wrong again and we’re 2 wins better.  At a minimum, I’m not putting on my parachute just yet despite a Cotton Bowl loss to a good Ole Miss team.  They’re right.  We don’t have to play an SEC schedule, so 9 wins and a re-match shouldn’t be a stretch.